Statement of Purpose

| April 9, 2015

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1. my essay is too prolix , please make it concise
2. my essay looks tedious, please make it vivid ,so admission committee can feel fresh and have a good impression.
3. my word choice is pretty bad, please help with words and replace with more suitable ones.
4. I am no good at punctuation, so this might be a problem.
5. My start and ending does not sounds attractive.
6. Last but not least , I am not good at praise myself , so please embellish my essay and make my statement stand out as a much better student than it now seems like.

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The effects of vaccines/immunizations on autism
Teachers' attitudes toward using technology for educational purposes


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